I have recently taken up applying the age-old practise of "hidings" (known in Afrikaans as 'pakslae') to the rearing of my four-year old daughter.
Is it right, correct, acceptable?
Dunno. What I can say: it's more effective as a shock tactic and, less so, as a means to instill discipline.
That only comes with a measured conversation once the sobbing (mostly acting) has subsided and she can - at minute intervals and very fleetingly - look Mommy in the eye. The joys - especially on a Saturday evening!
My Mum - who used a leather belt, back in the day, on the few occasions she could actually catch me - always said it hurt her more than it did me. I never believed her, until now.
Although times have changed and we rarely admonish our children physically (as the tongue - and for older kids: wallet - have been proved time and again much mightier than the belt), every negative encounter I have with my daughter is, to me, a real pity.
I have come to believe it is a matter of channelling - and closely monitoring - her energies, equilibrium (the condition of balance between varying, shifting and opposing forces that is characteristic of living processes - exacerbated by sugar intake) being my awareness of when free-play nears hysteria.
As an only child, Leia's friendship with her neighbouring playmate is a source of endless relief to me, at times. Problem is, this little free-spirited urchin has a way of knowing exactly when I've slipped into a persistent vegetative state (called work on my laptop)
And that is exactly when she (bless her innocently devious soul) convinces my daughter to get up to endless tricks (let's paint our nails with Tipp-Ex, let's pick all the 85-year old neighbour's dandelions, let's race our bikes without breaks down the middle of the long steep road from the top!)
Sigh... vegetating about this at my laptop, at this hour, it all seems so funny and far away :)
Bless their sweet souls (this pic taken this arvie, PRIOR TO hysteria):
Is it right, correct, acceptable?
Dunno. What I can say: it's more effective as a shock tactic and, less so, as a means to instill discipline.
That only comes with a measured conversation once the sobbing (mostly acting) has subsided and she can - at minute intervals and very fleetingly - look Mommy in the eye. The joys - especially on a Saturday evening!
My Mum - who used a leather belt, back in the day, on the few occasions she could actually catch me - always said it hurt her more than it did me. I never believed her, until now.
Although times have changed and we rarely admonish our children physically (as the tongue - and for older kids: wallet - have been proved time and again much mightier than the belt), every negative encounter I have with my daughter is, to me, a real pity.
I have come to believe it is a matter of channelling - and closely monitoring - her energies, equilibrium (the condition of balance between varying, shifting and opposing forces that is characteristic of living processes - exacerbated by sugar intake) being my awareness of when free-play nears hysteria.
As an only child, Leia's friendship with her neighbouring playmate is a source of endless relief to me, at times. Problem is, this little free-spirited urchin has a way of knowing exactly when I've slipped into a persistent vegetative state (called work on my laptop)
And that is exactly when she (bless her innocently devious soul) convinces my daughter to get up to endless tricks (let's paint our nails with Tipp-Ex, let's pick all the 85-year old neighbour's dandelions, let's race our bikes without breaks down the middle of the long steep road from the top!)
Sigh... vegetating about this at my laptop, at this hour, it all seems so funny and far away :)
Bless their sweet souls (this pic taken this arvie, PRIOR TO hysteria):
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